If you’re like me, you often start in your own mind, full of experiences and lessons learned, and you ponder. Then you turn to others who have more experience than you on the topic.
Finally, when no answer is found laterally, you look up to Jesus.
Wouldn’t our lives be simpler if we started with Jesus?
Am I uninformed? No, that’s definitely not it. I’ve read books, consulted experts, seen doctors. From my own experience, I know what works for me. When I work the plan, the plan works. I just can’t seem to work the plan.
Am I lazy? I know I can be, but generally I’m not. Like most people, I make time for what is important to me. OK, well, I can be a procrastinator – my husband calls me “last minute Mary." I suppose that’s a form of laziness. But hey, the laundry gets done, work gets done, we don’t go hungry. I got the basics covered.
Maybe I lack discipline. I intend to go the pool around 1:30, then suddenly it’s 3PM and all the kids will be there after school. Or, I need to start dinner by 4:30 and suddenly it’s 6PM. In each case, I noticed the time, but needed to do that one more thing before I could find the proverbial stopping point.
No, while all of these could be symptoms, they are not the root cause of why I am lousy at self-care. The Lord’s answer was so simple I still struggle to believe it.
I don’t love myself like He loves me,
or value myself like He values me.
I can quote Biblical truth about myself: Jesus loves me, I am more precious than silver, more valuable than gold, etc. I’ve experienced Jesus’ love through others. I have an amazing husband, a loving family, and close long-time friends.
And yet somehow, deep down inside,
I don’t believe I’m loveable.
A word the Lord whispered to me last weekend now makes sense: unbelief. The sin of unbelief – unbelief in His great love for me, and my own value to Him. Unbelief in His grace to cover my sins.
And I can’t love others with His love if I haven’t first received it myself.
Lord, thank you for mercifully revealing my sin to me. I’m so sorry, please forgive me.
And change me!
I now have to walk out what I’ve counseled to many others (aka, eat my own words): obey and the feelings will follow. By faith, I need to think/talk/act according to the truth that He loves me deeply and I am valuable to Him, and He will change my heart along the way.
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. (Hebrews 11:1, NIV)
Stay tuned for Part 3 on Friday: Act on What I Know
Thank you, Jesus, for being my go-to source for the truth I need, for all the answers to all problems, always!
TODAY’S CHALLENGE: On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being “fully grasp”, how would you rate your belief of how much Jesus loves you? Ask Him what faith steps you need to take to know His love more deeply.
If God spoke to you through this post today, I'd love to hear about it - please leave a comment!